Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Tired and Not Loving It

Have you ever had those moments or days where it takes so much energy to do anything?  Where you just don't have it in you to do things that normally fill your day?

I've been having a few of them lately; in fact, every day in the last while!  If you wonder where I've been it's that I'm using all my energy to get through the days and that includes my work.

The kids both completed grade 9 successfully.  It is most likely that son will be spending time with a tutor this summer as his math mark showed how much of a struggle he had.  He does not have much confidence in himself and tends to give up rather quickly rather than spending more time on a math problem.  He also tends to rush through the questions and it is difficult to re-read test questions or homework. 

Daughter finished with excellent marks and will spend her summer doing "Tech" things and spending time with her best friend from Alberta.  Friend from Alberta will be joining us for 3 weeks in late July and we intend to do a little travelling.  Oh yeah - sis in Ottawa....that means we're heading your way for the last week in July - you can be a hard person to get a hold of!  It will be me, daughter and her friend descending upon your home. 

The heat and sun are trying to make a dedicated appearance in our area.  Seems the fog has taken offence to that and in the city, where I work, the fog ebbs and flows daily.  Sometimes the sun peeks out for an hour or so before being obscured once again by the creeping fog.  Some fog is refreshing especially during some of the warmer and muggier days we've seen out here.  Out in the "valley" where I live, we are outside the fog belt (hubby made sure of that) and the weather is usually 5 degrees warmer (Celsius, that is) and muggier.  Son, his cousin and my hubby have actually swum in the lake....proclaiming it to be warm.  Ha!  I'm not buying into that just yet!  I plant myself into a chair beneath the maple tree and carry out lifeguarding duties.

I drove daughter's friend home today and the route took us the OTHER way around our lake.  While driving past the second (and smaller) beaver dam at the far end of the lake I was amazed to see a painted, WOODEN ROOSTER planted on the top of the dam!  I'm going to break out my camera and snap a photo or two because it is a funny sight!  I have no idea how long it has been there or if there is any particular reason why someone stuck it on top of the dam (gee...maybe the beaver borrowed it from someone's back yard??) but it is quite a sight!

Gardens are a-bloom with the early summer flowers and folliage.  We planted most of the annuals and moved around perennials.  Last summer we took out the evergreen bushes in the front gardens and this year the most amazing plants sprung to life!  In the front garden there appear to be an azalea bush, a rose bush, some lilies in addition to the irises; the mum from the pot grew back with a vengeance.  Why would the previous owners want to cover all that up with ugly evergreens?  We put in some black-eyed Susan's and I want to transplant a pink potentilla bush from the backyard to the front garden.  I shall take pictures shortly and post some "before" and "after" pics for you to see.

Son likes to be engaged constantly and does not like being on his own.  Which is the reason why I changed my working hours to part-time evening and weekends.  Only I didn't mean every.freakin'.weekend!  Except that is what is happening.  Work is going very well as a part-time occupation.  A bit of time away from the house and a little money on the side.  For the most part it is the customers who make the job fun for me.  I get to indulge in my "gift of the gab" and the customers respond in kind.  I do get grouchy ones and occasionally it feels like they all stood in line together to be nasty all at once.  The people who become the angriest, actually, are the ones I ask for I.D. because their signatures don't match their credit cards at all.  Not even remotely.  Boy, do some of them get ticked off when I keep the card until other identification is shown.  It appears that my doing this is the uncommon and unheard-of procedure.  The ones who have had their cards stolen previously are thankful that someone is checking.... 

So far I've worked the front cash, in the tool section (tool corral it is called) and outside in the garden centre.  The garden centre is quite nice and you aren't watched as closely out there.  With some store managers you feel like you are back in kindergarden again!  Some of these people need to chill out and relax a little - if we don't have enough staff to efficiently help everyone when it is busy, don't freak out at me!  I'm going to snap right back at you!  There are a few people on the staff that I try to avoid and don't care for at all.  There are a lot of younger people, teens, working there and it is interesting to have them around.  They sure can make you feel your age!!  I had my first "round table" meeting last week.  That's where miscellaneous employees sit with a couple of the managers and go over procedures and bring any problems to light.  I brought forward some of the concerns I've seen on the cash register line and it remains to be seen if anything is resolved.

On top of this I have a small and ongoing medical concern that is starting to affect my life in an increasingly bigger way....*sigh*..... nothing is easy, is it?  This is when I really miss having a family doctor; one who is familiar with my history and situation.  I've been in this province a year now and am already sick to death of the health care system. I've had to make use of the emergency care system and the after-hours clinic and I have grown to hate them so much I'd rather endure any health concern than use those services.  I am tired of being treated in a condescending manner, by abrupt and rude doctors who are overworked and tired.  And who usually don't want to be with me as much as I don't want to be with them.  So it will be interesting to see what happens if this minor health concern doesn't take care of itself.  I'm not about to subject myself to the whim of a so-called professional who believes they know best - and are shocked when I say "no".  The word "no" is very liberating and enjoyable and is partially responsible for why I come across as cranky and eccentric with some.  I love "no".  After years of being the "yes" woman and going along with what anyone and everyone said and wanted, I am LOVING the "no" effect and using it wherever possible.  Perhaps it is a sign of maturity?  (Immaturity some would probably say)  I'd say by my age, 44, I have the knowledge and power to make decisions for myself rather than be swayed or led into one or another.  Oh, the power of "no"!!!!!

Oh, we found out that the new SUV needs a cadillac converter.  The vehicle is still under warranty and will be repaired once the back-ordered item actually shows up out here.  Now really, what were the chances of THAT failing on the first day we took possession of the vehicle?  My faith in mankind - or car salesmen in particular - took another spectacular hit after that!

so that is my ordinary world for now.  Not enough energy to be hip-hip-hooray but still enough to enjoy the early summer and blooming flowers.  I do hope to drop in often and to take some colourful pictures to upload.

Oh yeah, and Nana and Poppa return home tomorrow!  Yeahhhh!  We all sure missed them.  And no, I didn't "shop" for flowers in Nana's garden while she was away....she knows where to find me folks; and I'd be the first stop on her way to get the plants back!  Ha ha ha, the Lupine flowers are looking mighty fine right now though....


Julie said...

I, too, have become much more of a "NO" person as I age. "NO" as in, I'm not taking this guff from you. It is very liberating.

Mark Salinas said...

Very fun read :)